Hello Internet

Hello Internet

Wednesday, June 27, 2012

An Open Letter

Thank you. No seriously, Thank you. (yes this is sarcasm)

To everyone at the gym tonight who didn't say a word to me while they politely laughed at my jokes.

I have a friend who will show you her teeth every time you share a meal with her. She begs you to "check them". I thought this was insane. I mean really certifiable but...

This might have been staged for dramatic effect.
There was a piece of oregano in my teeth from my dinner. Seriously!

As soon as I got home I went into the bathroom and sure enough, there it was. Big as you like.

I made two stops after I left the gym.

People stared and I'm pretty sure it had everything to do with my teeth and nothing to do with the fact that I was wearing pigtails and a dewrag, not to mention the smell.

It was definitely the oregano.

What must they think?

I felt shame.

I'm going to floss and brush one more time just to be sure my chompers are their shiny best and then maybe I will be able to sleep tonight without having nightmares about rotting teeth.

PS

I don't want to have to ask so please raise your right hand and promise you will say something next time.




Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Tug Boat Time

That's kind of like Miller Time but a lot less fun. Sure there is Sun and Sea and occasionaly dolphins but....

Well if you have never worked on a boat, and I don't mean that silly little skiff you have sitting in your driveway, you won't understand.

If you want to try and understand, or at least see how those salty sailors live:


Chronicles of Crew Change


The Husband, AKA triple S has a blog.  <3

Enter at your own risk. He has been known to ruffle a few feathers. :-)

Monday, June 11, 2012

Dante's Inferno


 


They say the 9th circle of hell is the one reserved for betrayers. I'm not about to argue with that but I would like to know who I betrayed?


You might be asking yourself why it is that I think I'm in hell. (Excellent question by the way.)

3 words.

Bathing Suit Shopping.

Now one might think that this year would be less stressful than last since I've lost weight and am working out. You'd be WRONG. Horribly Horribly wrong.

This year the nightmare is being caused by my top half. Which despite my shrinking size has refused to follow suit. (Triple S is glad for this.)

I just want a suit that will allow me to chase after my kids without the fear of a wardrobe malfunction without having to get one that looks like it's 1920.
Is she wearing tights?

 I've already been to 4 stores and spent way too  much time online. Maybe I just wont go swimming at all this summer?

That doesn't seem like a real option so I'm off again. Fingers crossed today I will have success.