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Showing posts from April, 2014

Ninja Resume

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If you aren't already concerned for me you might want to rethink your stance.

I just spent the last hour getting out of a choke hold and a head lock.

Then I closed my eyes and waited to be attacked.

-Did you call the police?

No.

-Why the hell not?

Because I paid for that.

-You might want to reread 50 Shades of Grey. You are confused about "rough play".

What? No! I paid because I just got out of Krav Maga class.

What is Krav Maga you say? 

AWESOMESAUSE that's what.

Okay so maybe fighting some guy isn't your idea of a great Tuesday night but I think I have mentioned before that I'm not normal.

Since we moved to the South I feel like I am only adding to my Ninja Resume and not my real one. (That is a real thing. You don't know about it because the first rule of a Ninja Resume is.... Well you know.)

That's cool though because since I can't grow anything or operate on anyone I am going to need some marketable skills when civilization collapses and I …