Thursday, December 13, 2012

Triple S Would Make a Horrible Spy

Not because he has a bad poker face or because he can't be sneaky.

He has a great poker face and he can be very sneaky. This comes in handy because like a 6 year old I will search for my Christmas presents. It's not that I don't like surprises.

I do. I just have no self control. (I'll pause while you gasp dramatically.)

Triple S can't be a spy because he answers questions in his sleep.

Tug Timmy, Triple S's home away from home.

Scott works on a tugboat. He works a 2 and 2 schedule. For you non boat people that means he works for 2 weeks on the boat (yes, he even sleeps there), then he is home for 2 weeks. That is 2 whole weeks where he has nothing to do. Well nothing except my honey do list. It usually isn't that long since I'm handy.

You would think this would mean I would make him do all kinds of stuff so I could take a break but because I am so freaking awesome I don't do that. Also it's just easier to do most things myself. (And it's possible that I'm a eansy weensie, tiny bit of a control freak.)

To say Triple S isn't a morning person is what some might call an understatement. I would rather try and put mittens on honey badgers than have to wake him up before 10. 

Why so angry cutie pie?

This means our routine doesn't change even when he is home. I still get up and get the kids ready for school.

You know dressed, breakfast, teeth brushed. All the regular stuff.

(Crazy people put their pants on one leg at a time just like the "normals")

Along with this we also take our neighbors son with us. He's a good kid and it's not like I'm not already going there.

The poor guy has been sick, some horrible stomach bug that is plaguing our school.

So instead of waiting for a knock at our door I left for school with just my two monsters.

When I got home I walked into my bedroom and curled up next to my hubby to snuggle. Okay it was really to steal his warmth. The man is a human furnace and since the car doesn't even have time to warm up before I am already back home I was freezing.

What? I love him for more than just his body heat. Stop judging me!

Now comes the part where I point out that he isn't spy material.

3S- Luke knocked at the door, why did you leave without him?

Me- His mom texted me he wasn't going to school again. Did you answer the door?

3S- No.

Me- Then how do you know it was them?

3S- Who else would be knocking on the door this early? (this was sound logic so I stopped questioning him)

Two hours later when the bear emerged from the cave I asked him if Luke had come by again while I was out.

3S- Why would Luke come by?

Me- You said he knocked on the door this morning.

3S- When did I say this?

He forgot all of it. The entire conversation. I'm not even sure if anyone actually knocked on the door.

Even after being reminded of the details he insisted that it never happened.

Needless to say I don't think this is a great quality for a spy. I didn't check with the CIA but I do watch Burn Notice and Covert Affairs.

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