It's Summer! and Frogs pee.

Summer had officially started in our house.

For us that means the kids are out of school and I'm not working. (This teacher thing is AWESOME!)

I'm not going to bore you with our exciting plans this year. I'm not that evil and they're not that exciting.

Instead I want to bore you with stories about my kids. I meant regale. Yeah regale. That's a fancy word!

Today we went to the pool. (see exciting.)

In the span of a few hours my kids talked to everyone. I mean everyone. They don't care how old you are, what you look like, if you are trying to sleep. They will tell you who they are, how old they are, where they were yesterday. Random details about their lives.

The funniest one today was about peeing frogs.

WHAT? That's weird right?


So the pool attracts frogs. The kids find them in the filters and pull them out. Releasing them into the wild while I sing Born Free, (as free as the wind freeeeeeeeee).

Some teenage girls were not as keen to touch them as my kids and there was some squealing as Natalie walked by to release the 4th frog she had found.

Laughing she smiled at them. "Once a frog peed on my mom." She must have thought the subsequent looks were strange as she thought that was one of the coolest things to ever happen.

They didn't.The glanced at me with nervous eyes like frog pee might be contagious.



In total they found 10 frogs today. Colin and Natalie took turns naming them.

See, frog pee and awesome kids.

You should regale your friends with this story.

Warriors Unite!

So remember back when I did the Spartan Race?

Apparently this is my new thing. I go to the gym. I drink protein shakes and I run obstacle races.

Weird. Really weird, but that's nothing new.

So this past weekend was another race.  The Warrior Dash.

Please note the AWESOME t shirts Triple S made for us.

 So early Saturday morning my ladies and I (plus one 'little' brother) got in the pedophile van* and headed to the race. There was singing and laughing and ridiculous antics. We played the radio loud and giggled like school girls. Not a one of us under 35, all of us mothers, all of us normal, responsible adults.

But underneath all those years is still that ridiculous girl that danced silly and sang loudly with her friends.

You give us some matching shirts and a chance to get dirty and we might as well be 15 again.

Plus the Warrior Dash is like the Spartan lite. All of the fun with none of the bruises.

Hell we didn't even get dirty until the last 15 yards.

There was fire

I'm the one that looks the most graceful. (2nd from the right)

and ropes.

That's my pink butt half way down the rope.

 So we ran together. We cheered for each other. We walked a bit. We climbed, balanced and crawled over cars together. Basically the ultimate girls day.

Then we got dirty. That's me in the upper right hand corner trying to pull some poor lady out of the mud. In the middle it was so thick people were getting stuck. (My inner nerd kept repeating the phrase Super Saturated. Because that is what nerds think about when other people get stuck in quicksand like mud.)

Then we got VIKING HATS! seriously. We all got one of these, plus a t shirt and a medal. I'm beginning to see why people sign up for these. FREE STUFF!

Plus after we got dirty there was a guy with a fire hose that cleaned us off like we were in a political riot.

It was a lot like this but with smiles.

So the next race is the Hero's Rush and then The Dirty Girl.

It's a sickness. Just do one they say. It's fun they say.

I might need an intervention. I'll let you know in October.

** sorry but it isn't really a pedophile van. It's just a giant blue van but it looks like it might have been on 'to catch a predator'.

Memory is Weird

***warning***

This post contains almost no humor.
Mostly it is a late anniversary present to Triple S.

Proceed at your own risk.


There are certain things that always trigger a memory. Sights, sounds, smells. Memory is much more than just pictures. For me, my easiest trigger is music.

I've forgotten most of my high school days. (I'm old, Remember?) I don't remember who I had for Sophomore math or who taught me what a monologue was. I can't remember who sat next to me in homeroom or who my locker was next to.

I can remember walking home from a party and singing "More Than Words" by Extreme with a girlfriend.

I remember playing the cassette single for Lisa Loeb until I knew every word in my little blue Ford Tempo.

I'm taking this horrible musical trip down memory lane because my new car has Satellite Radio. A wonderful luxury that I am enjoying to the fullest.

The decades channels are making me smile with every horrible song that plays.

Who could forget the adorable guy in Art who introduced me to Mathew Sweet?

It doesn't stop with High School though.

There are songs that I so totally identify with people it's like they wrote the songs themselves. Sometimes because we shared a memory with music as the soundtrack or because at the time I thought the song was so perfect for them or our relationship or just because I thought they would like it.

Right now though, this post is about my husband.

Sitting at a friends house the other day, enjoying a great girls night, music was playing softly in the background. At one point an Eagles song came on.

I was in college when this CD came out. I remember buying it and loving it. I remember there was a song called "Get Over It" that I loved because it was such a kick in the ass to complainers. (Something I was never a fan of.)

I remember finding this song just as Triple S and I started to get serious. I loved this song and I was quickly falling in love with him. I thought it was perfect.

I don't remember why it wasn't our wedding song (we chose Harry Connick jr's version of "It Had To Be You") but it is the song that makes me think of my husband. The song that reminds me what those first few months felt like. The song that triggers memory's that leave me smiling until my face aches.

Sadly this isn't Funny.

Heard this on the radio this afternoon.

Apparently Macklemore and Ryan Lewis didn't get the Snoop Dog Memo. (Or Snoop Lion. Maybe this is a P Ditty name change thing?) Rap will never embrace gay people.

If I were gay I wouldn't lose too much sleep over this. They haven't been 'embracing' the female population either. Unless you like being called a ho in which case your welcome.

I don't say this to bad mouth rap. I grew up in the 80s and the 90s. At one point I knew all of the words to 'Nuthin' but a "G" Thang' and I love the Beasties Boys. (I'm singing Sabotage in my head right now.)

You can of course argue that none of that is rap but that isn't really the point.

I think he's wrong.

Time is the universal equalizer.

Things that were so forbidden that we couldn't even talk about them are common place 100 years later.

I hope Gay rights don't take that long but in the mean time it's always nice to see someone say F U with a smile and say how they feel. Even if their 'peers' might not agree.

Love is Love is Love is Love. 

Update 6/26/2013

So the supreme court got rid of DOMA. I'd like to think after a millions papers written about equal rites and marches and protests and people standing up against unbelievable odds it was all thanks to my blog.

Okay, that's a tiny bit silly. I'll take like %75 of the credit.

Congratulations to humanity for taking one step closer to equality for all.

My Last Day.

I was going to call this I Survived but apparently I already said that when I was talking about that Crazy Race and that isn't what I'm talking about now.

Now I'm talking about Preschool.

Today was the last day for my little ones.

Tomorrow night they graduate, then they will spend the summer making their parents insane before they head off to kindergarten.

I've learned a few things along the way and I wanted to share them with you in case anyone ever offers you a group of young minds to mold. I mean teach. I totally meant teach. Not mold. That would be weird.

1. Stockpiling is a necessity when it comes to red paint and glue sticks. Hoard them like they are the only weapon that will work against the zombies.

2. Snot is sticky. You might already know this but it needs repeating.

3. Whining is contagious like Ebola. You need to stop it at patient zero or it can turn into an epidemic.

4. Structure is great but you need to go with the flow sometimes and that might mean your perfectly cut craft turns into a fairy unicorn instead of the horse and carriage you found on pintrest.

5. Kids can be frustrating beyond words.

6. Kids can be insanely funny, sweet, kind and insightful.

7. Yesterday was the most exciting day ever. Or it's hard for four year olds to grasp the concept of time.

 8. Mom's cry over their babies big moments. Some times it's my fault, some times it's not. Either way you have to comfort them.

9. Adding dots to letters is fancy. 

Now I don't remember anything about being in Preschool personally. I know it was in a church in Queens but I don't remember any classmates or teachers. I don't remember what color the walls were or what songs we sang at circle time.

I'm not so vain as to think I have somehow changed their lives but I hope I gave them a good start so that one day when they meet that teacher that they remember forever it's for all the right reasons.

For me it was Mrs. Hall. She taught 3rd grade and I remember sitting in her class and learning how to fold an origami swan. I know she taught me about the states and multiplication and a thousand other things but that one moment I remember like it was yesterday.

If you've ever sat in a boring meeting with me than you know I can still do it. I can still fold that perfect swan 30 years later.  

Lost and Found

So Triple S flew home from the tugboat yesterday. While he was hanging at the CLT airport waiting for his ride he found a lost phone. I told him to use the white courtesy phone and page the owner but apparently that isn't an option anymore.

He tried texted someone called "sweetie" assuming they might be able to help but they didn't respond.

So this morning I tried to contact them again only to realize the phone was shut off.

Challenge accepted!

I checked email, the address book, the navigation. I was hoping for something that could lead me to the owner.

The phone isn't new. It is a 3 year old HTC and it certainly isn't worth anything but I couldn't help but think about how awesome I would feel if it was mine and it was returned.

Google to the rescue!!

I found enough facts to find an address. It's in the mail on the way back to it's owner. Of course I left a super obnoxious note along with it.





You're welcome random traveller! 

Fact #476 About Me

OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG

I know what fighter pilots felt like when Top Gun came out!

Seriously, this is so freaking cool.

So here is the fact about me and why I'm overly excited about this movie.

I went to Boat College. Yeah that's a real place. Where you get actual college credit for learning how to tie knots and what is in a life boat.

Bailer
Bilge pump
Boat hooks
Buckets
Can opener

If you are reading this and you just finished my list with 'compass' then you know what I'm talking about. If you didn't, sorry you can't cheat by watching a marathon of Deadliest Catch. (Those guys are NOT my shipmates. They are insane lunatics with a death wish and serious impulse control issues.)

My shipmates include Captains of some of the largest vessels on the ocean, tugboats and cruise ships, port engineers and lawyers. Environmental clean up specialists and building managers for skyscrapers.

Boat school is surprisingly more versatile than you might think.

But none of that is important right now.

Mearsk Alabama was Captained by an Alumni of my school. Richard Phillips.

This isn't' like when some UNC grad finds another UNC grad. Thousands of kids go there and none of them have anything more in common than a piece of paper.

Massachusetts Maritime Academy is different.

Training Ship Patriot State

It's not a regular college.

We call them sea stories, although not all of them involve the sea.

Me (on the right) and my roommate about to initiate some pollywogs into Neptune's realm.

Stories of trips to foreign lands and insane feats pulled off under the normally watchful eye of a commanding officer. Stories about the mid watch or the hand rail cooling system.

Most of them make us laugh out loud while strangers listen in horror.

What is so funny about being made to stand with your flashlight on your head screaming "I'm a lighthouse." over and over again? Or about being woken up by a screaming man at 3 am to run into the ocean surf and then roll around in the sand fully clothed?

This is me dressed and ready for a lifeboat drill.

These things can't be explained.


 The point of this is when you are watching Shane Murphy be all hero like I want you to think about me yelling at him to swab a deck, or needle gun some rust. That was how he spent his freshman cruise.

Pretty sure that's why he didn't crack under pressure.

That or he comes from a good family that raised him to be an honorable man.

Nah. I'm taking credit. I was really good at yelling.

Was? Sorry, good point. I AM really good at yelling.

Bottom row all the way to the right, me.

“Sir/Ma’am. Mine is not to question why. Mine is but to do or die. Mine is not to

question how. Mine is but to do it now, Sir/Ma’am.”